No Guilt Mom

Reclaiming Your Life When You Become a Mom with Amanda Rush Holmes

April 11, 2023 No Guilt Mom, JoAnn Crohn, Brie Tucker, Amanda Rush Holmes Episode 179
No Guilt Mom
Reclaiming Your Life When You Become a Mom with Amanda Rush Holmes
Show Notes Transcript

We’re sitting down with Amanda Rush Holmes, the CEO of The Virtual Assistant Studio, creator of Full Time VA, and host of the Millenial Mom Movement Podcast. She helps moms become profitable virtual assistants while also being a mom of two boys. This interview is a must-listen as we dive into first-time mom feelings, losing your identity, balancing the workload with your partner, and so much more

In this episode of the No Guilt Mom podcast, you’ll learn:

  • How to adjust to the feeling of “losing your freedom” when you become a first-time mom
  • How to find your identity as a mom and a valuable worker 
  • How to create freedom and flexibility in your day-to-day life 

Resources we shared in this episode: 

Visit The Full Time VA and get your FREE training and guide! 

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Download the episode transcripts HERE!

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Transcripts for No Guilt Mom Podcast Episode 179

Transcripts were provided using A.I. There may be some mistakes as a result.

[00:00:00] JoAnn Crohn: Welcome to the No Guilt Mom podcast. I am your host, JoAnn Crohn, joined by the lovely Brie Tucker! 

[00:00:07] Brie Tucker: Hello. Hello every buddy! How are you? Lovely that, that's very lovely. Literally sounding to me. I love it. 

[00:00:14] JoAnn Crohn: And Spring. Spring, cuz it's spring. 

[00:00:18] Brie Tucker: Well gonna be. Yes. Yes. It's spring. 

[00:00:21] JoAnn Crohn: It's spring, like I'll play along. 

I totally just like blew our cover there.

[00:00:26] Brie Tucker: I'm like, well, it's winter. Oh wait, no, the skin, it's winter. It's winter in spring. So yes, it's spring. 

[00:00:32] JoAnn Crohn: You didn't hear that out in podcast Land? No. We're finishing this episode being a little like I'm a little ver. Like to use a term that like I'm a little like all up in the fields here and a little scared based on what we talked about with Amanda, but I think that we're gonna save that discussion for our outro.

So listen to our discussion with Amanda. Try to guess what, what I may be a little crazed about. I don't think you'll be able to guess. But we're Amanda Rush Holmes is the c e o of the virtual Assistant studio creator of Full-time va, and host of the Millennial Mom Movement podcast. She helps moms become profitable virtual assistants and is the mom to two boys.

You need to listen to this interview because it is going to open up your world. 

[00:01:19] Brie Tucker: Yes. This is a must listen. A must listen episode! 

[00:01:22] JoAnn Crohn: Must listen and then make sure to join me and Brie at the end for a little wrap up. And I'll tell you, I'll tell you what we're thinking right now. So we hope you enjoy this interview that we had with Amanda.

You want mom life? To be easier. That's our goal too. Our mission is to raise more self-sufficient and independent kids, and we are going to have fun doing it. We're gonna help you delegate and step back. Each episode will tackle strategies for positive discipline, making our kids more responsible and making our lives better in the process.

Welcome to the No Guilt Mom Podcast.

Welcome, Amanda, to the podcast. We're so excited to have you here. 

[00:02:17] Amanda Rush Holmes: Well, I'm excited to be here. Thank you. 

[00:02:19] JoAnn Crohn: Where are you, Amanda? 

[00:02:21] Amanda Rush Holmes: I'm based out of Atlanta, Georgia, so I'm like you guys. I'm in the suburbs. Probably like 45. No, well, Atlanta traffic's not the best, so probably like 40 minutes outside the city. So we've got two kids.

You know, you gotta like live what their good schools are and whatnot. 

[00:02:35] JoAnn Crohn: Yeah. It's good. It's good out in the burbs. It's good for burb life, right? Like 

[00:02:40] Amanda Rush Holmes: Oh, I love it. Everything is like five minutes away. Like targets, Starbucks, the Publix, like there's no complaints. 

[00:02:47] JoAnn Crohn: Yeah, I'll do, I do miss like being who I was before I had kids, cuz I used to live in LA and just, we lived in this little tiny town, like 10 minutes outside of LA and it was called Montrose.

And literally like two blocks away, we could walk to this main street, which didn't have a big supermarket, but had like little tiny restaurants and like shops and all these things where it would make it hard, I think, day to day with kids, but also it was so quaint and lovely and I'm just. I think I'm looking forward to empty nesting.

Going back to that, like you have to look forward to something, right? Yeah. 

[00:03:23] Amanda Rush Holmes: I know what you mean though. Like I think I kinda mourned my life when I had my first kid before kids. I don't, I mean, you don't know what you don't know. And of course, like I wanted to have kids and I wanted to be a mom, but there was such like a shift.

Responsibility. I think that obviously comes with having a kid, but also freedom. Like I used to be able to like be like, oh, you know what? I'm gonna like wake up at 6:00 AM and go to yoga today. And then the next day be like, I think I'm gonna wake up at nine and get coffee. But like with the kid, the kid is like, well, I'm gonna wake up at seven no matter what, and we're gonna do what I say.

Cause like we're on a routine. You know? 

[00:03:59] JoAnn Crohn: Yeah, yeah. I, I remember being nine months pregnant, like two days from my due date, standing in my bathroom closet, and I got this wave of, what did I do like, because all the freedom goes away when you have kids and. You don't know what you're getting into, but I think it's something that a lot of moms have a hard time admitting that there is a sense of loss when you have a child, a loss of your identity, a loss of what you're able to do.

And like, let's, let's face it, a loss of career options today for moms that somehow supposed to be okay with, it's supposed to be resigned to you, but it's so hard. 

[00:04:41] Amanda Rush Holmes: It's so hard, like, I mean, even as a woman, there's so many things that people don't talk about. I remember before I started my business, I was working in the corporate world and I knew, okay, I wanna have a family.

I need to start planning this. Do I even like the job that I'm in right now? Because once I get pregnant, you, it's not like you can be going on interviews because as much as like there are laws that protect you against that, let's be honest. Like if somebody sees somebody that's eight months pregnant, are they thinking I'm gonna hire that person?


[00:05:10] JoAnn Crohn: mm-hmm. 

[00:05:11] Amanda Rush Holmes: Probably not. And even if they do, benefits aren't gonna kick in. You're not gonna have like paid. There's just so many things to think about and then you have to think, okay, what am I gonna do once the baby comes like, Does this company offer paid leave? How do I make money? What do I do when I come back?

Like how do I find childcare? There's just so many things that go into it that were like the system, so to speak. It just really isn't set up to be like conducive or supportive for working moms. 

[00:05:36] Brie Tucker: Not at all. Yeah. I remember like talking about all of that. I just like my little thing. I remember before I had my kids, I was a manager at a fairly large nonprofit here in Phoenix working, and I managed a whole department that covered like all of Maricopa County for early intervention and. I remember thinking to myself like, okay, I'm gonna have my kids. I'm gonna come back. It'll be fine. I lasted like a month and I just couldn't do it. Even though I had a super supportive boss, just like the commute driving back and forth to work, like I only would get to see my kid for like an hour when I got home.

And I just remember sobbing because I loved, like you're talking about that. Do I really like the job I'm in? I loved my job. I loved what I did. I absolutely fell apart. Had to come in and like tell her like, I can't do this. Like I'm, I am miserable every day. Eventually I ended up cutting back on hours and then eventually just had to fade out of that entire career because there was no way I could do it having two small kids. 

[00:06:39] Amanda Rush Holmes: Yeah, and it's such a hard choice to make, right? Like you have to choose between something that's so valuable to you and it's like part of your identity and something that you love, like you love your job, but you also love your kids. And you're like, I know I'm not gonna get this moment back with my kids.

So like you made the choice to have to leave so that you can. Take those moments that you know are fleeting. Yeah. And there's so many women in that position. Like, that was me. I was like the same thing as you. I had maybe if I got lucky an hour, two hours a day. Cuz you know, you wake up early and you have to get to work and then they go to bed early cause they're little and so you may or may not get home by the time or if you do you're like brushing to like feed them and get them bathed and in bed and all of that.

And that's when I realized, oh my gosh. This cannot be the only way. Like there's no way that this is the only option for women. 

[00:07:27] JoAnn Crohn: Yeah. 

So it's not, it's not fair. Like I can identify with that too. When I was, I was a teacher. Before that I was in the entertainment industry and when I was in an entertainment industry, I was working as a producer and a junior executive.

I knew that I did not wanna do that job with kids. I, I knew. When I was in it, because the amount of time it took, the amount of after hours time it takes with you have to go to drinks, you have to go to dinner, because it's all about the relationships. Like I knew I had to get out of it, and that's why I went into teaching because I loved working with kids.

But when I had my daughter and I was teaching, it was okay. It was manageable, even though most of my salary was going to daycare. But Yep. Even in that situation, I'm like, my gosh, when I have two kids, I cannot do this. Like I cannot manage it when my kids are sick. Just the emotional stress of them being sick and them being away from me, nor can I manage juggling that even though my husband's super supportive.

And so when my son was born, that's when I exited the profession and. I exited it with no plan. I was just gonna take a year off and then go back. I was like, let me just get my bearing. And it was then that I discovered this great kind of mix of being able to work for yourself and that's what you help.

Women, do you help women find that mix of being able to work for yourself and have that flexibility to take care of children? So tell us more about that. Like how is this possible where you can earn an income and still have that time you want with your kids? 

[00:09:04] Amanda Rush Holmes: Yeah. Okay. So many great questions. So I'll tell you a little bit about how I even got into this in the first place.

Cause I feel like this kind of like leads into how I now help other people. But we talked a little about, about, you know, I used to work in the corporate world. Well, my husband and I really struggled with fertility. We went through five miscarriages. Oh my gosh. And then we finally did IVF and had our beautiful miracle baby.

And here I was like we were just talking about in this corporate job, And I was like, this is crazy. I just spent the last three, four years of my life trying to have this beautiful baby and now I don't get to spend any time with him. And I was that person every single night. Like I feel like nine o'clock at night and I'm on Google and I'm typing in like how to work from home, how to make money from home work, from home jobs, from moms.

Like literally this is like what I would type in at Google. And the things that came up were. Very scary and I was thought I might be like at risk if somebody was gonna steal my identity, if I like input my information into any of these sites. Mm-hmm. There's absolutely no information. And truthfully, it wasn't until the beginning of 20 when the pandemic hit and I was laid off for my full-time job and I was like, I.

Really beautiful opportunity here to possibly pivot and figure out a solution to this problem that I've been experiencing for the past, like nine months since my child has been born. And I went onto the internet. This is literally how it got started. I went onto the internet and I went down the rabbit hole as we all do late at night on social media.

And of course I was like, Of course we've been there. Right? You know, like TikTok was a thing. And yeah, so I quickly realized, oh my gosh, there are so many business owners out there that need help. They're asking for things like, can you post on my social media? Can you write an email and send it out for me?

Can you manage my dms? Like very basic things that were also like interesting to me. I'm like, oh, that's kinda fun. Like I like writing emails, or I could post on social media for you. Or, oh, you need some content ideas? Yeah, I can do that for you. And so I very quickly, Oh wait, this isn't just like a fleeting thing. This is a whole industry. 

There are thousands of people out there that need support and that I was started working with clients and then I was like, oh, you know what, like this actually has a name. It's called 

being a virtual assistant. And during this process I was posting on social media about it, as we all do with our life.

You know, you're like, Hey, look at this cool new thing that I'm doing, and I quickly hug moms reach out and be like, wait a second. Did you leave your corporate job? And I was like, yeah. I was like, I not only love my corporate job, but I'm making more money and I do it when my son is napping. Like I literally work in the morning work when he's napping and then maybe I like squeeze in an hour at night if I like really feel like an overachiever and.

They're like, what is this? And I'm like, well, it's really cool. I'm like, it's called being a virtual assistant. And they're like, what the, is this like a thing? Is this a scam? Like people really pay you. And I was like, they do, they really pay me. And so that is when I decided, I was like, every mom needs to know about this opportunity.

And what's cool about it is like you get to choose what you're interested. And then work with that type of business. So like for me, I love being in the influencer space. I love supporting female business owners and that's how the program, which is our program full-time BA was was born is because I'm like, every mom needs to know about this opportunity and know that there is another way.

And it doesn't have to be hard and it doesn't have to be complicated. And like you probably already have the skills. Yeah, I think about. Going from being in like this amazing entertainment industry and then being a teacher. Mm-hmm. Like if that was somebody in our course, you have so many skills right there, just from those jobs you've already had.

Even like stay-at-home moms. Think about all the things you do as a stay-at-home mom within one day to manage a household. That is a person that I would want on my team. They are, oh, I know. Efficient. They're organized. They know how to manage people. Like, well, there's like, there's so many. 

[00:13:07] JoAnn Crohn: There's so much that you said in there that I wanna unpack.

One of the first things is that I think as women, that we really undervalue the skills we have. Yes. Uh, we were talking about this on a past podcast episode with Blessing Adesiyan of Mother, Honestly, and she says How Care is so undervalued. The care work we do and a lot of stuff, like you're saying, businesses need that care work.

It's that following up with people, it's that making sure people are doing okay, especially when it comes to managing others or like you said, reaching out and doing email that like what moms have those skills are. And we need to own that because so much of society tells us we're doing nothing because we're not earning money, but oh yeah, we need to own it.

[00:13:57] Brie Tucker: It's ridiculous how, how 2-sided it is as well. Right? I mean, we've talked about this before too, for when moms stay home and it we're considered that, like you just said, like people think that we're not doing anything. We think we're not doing anything. We think that we need to be grateful. That other people are supporting us so that we can be home.

Oh, because I'm home, that means that I don't, I shouldn't be able to go out. It means I shouldn't be able to ask to spend money on X, Y, Z because my partner is the one making the income. And that's not true at all. And, and, and having something that we can do and using our skills and finding a way back into.

I don't wanna say identity. Does anybody like know where I'm going with this? I, 

[00:14:36] JoAnn Crohn: I feel like it is identity though, because it's identity. Ok. Even though we're master caretakers, like, let's just, let's just say that we are master caretakers like we have so, Much going on for us. We could manage all of our kids' doctor's appointments, keep it all in our head, manage the family calendar, answer the questions of what's for dinner or tonight, like we are bosses, like total bosses that are completely undervalued.

And I think it is identity because we're so used to making our identity be in the work we do. Like you go to like any party, any get together, like what are the questions that's gonna come up is like, well, what do you do? And a lot of women kind of shy back from that, and they're like, oh, I'm only a, I'm only a stay-at-home.

And it's just not true. Yes. 

[00:15:23] Brie Tucker: Right. 

[00:15:23] Amanda Rush Holmes: I hate that. Like I'm only, or just I hear that, oh, I'm just a virtual assistant. No, you're a virtual assistant. Like you're the backbone of somebody's business. Like without you, they would not be able to scale or grow that business without you. There's no revenue without you, there's no customer support.

You're talking about all these different things that we own, the mental load. Is within just about every mom is insane. We're not just thinking about, oh, did we send that permission slip in? Did we pack the lunch? What are we out of dish soap? Did we sign up for soccer? Like the amount of things that happen in our brain.

Is incredible. Mm-hmm. It's not to be that person, but most men don't have that capability. That's what I was to be able to think forwardly. 

[00:16:10] JoAnn Crohn: I wanna challenge that though, because the reason that we do have that capability is because it has been expected of us and then we have had a lot of practice in it.

Yes. I don't think like men are inherently not able to do it. They just haven't had the chance and the opportunity to practice it. Which is like what I love seeing. Like in January when the, um, the Senate, well the house was having trouble electing a speaker and all of these male representatives had to bring in their kids and babies.

And it was the first time I have ever seen male Congress people out on the floor with a baby Bjorn strapped to them and like having to juggle that caretaking role and. Professional role and yeah, I think like more of that needs to happen where us women, we're not saying that we're the only ones capable of doing this because we really aren't.

We need to make sure that if we have a partner at home, that we're giving them equal opportunity to be in the caretaking role and not have to take it all on our selves. 

[00:17:17] Brie Tucker: Okay. But I'm gonna say this, like I, I do think that they do need more practice and we need to let, we need to like delegate more. We need to let go of the control and allow them to have the ability to like practice the skills.

But I will say this, you, when you were talking earlier, Amanda, about like the whole like, are we out of dish soap? Like da da da da. I love my husband. He is amazing. He does so much. He takes on so much of the mental load for us. Even though he does so much and he helps with caretaking and all those kinds of, He is never the one that notices all of that stuff.

He's not aware that we haven't washed our towels in a week or two. He has, he's not aware that the dog is outta dog food. He's not aware of all those little pieces that you were talking about, Amanda, that like the, that would make for a great virtual assistant, right? Because again, it's all the pieces that, that keep everything moving.

He is not aware of it. And you're right, Joanne. I bet a big portion of it is because he was never expected to do. Yeah, and he does take on a lot of it, but I just, I feel like that is just something that is, I don't know why we look for those small details, but we, we do and we can, and we can grasp them so quickly and so easily 

[00:18:28] JoAnn Crohn: because you've had experience with them. Because like when the dog's out of food, Brie, he comes to you. 

He doesn't go to your husband. 

[00:18:36] Brie Tucker: True. 

[00:18:36] JoAnn Crohn: He goes to you because he knows that you're gonna put that food in his dish much faster than your husband. So like if you were, poof, if you were, if you were gone for like a few, like a week, so you went to Italy again?


to Europe for like year, you know Chris to 

[00:18:51] Amanda Rush Holmes: Europe again? You should, yes, I 

[00:18:54] Brie Tucker: did. We did, we did last year and he Oh my, he had to, yeah. And he had to take care of the house and like, I've divorced and one of my kids was like, I'm gonna stay with Miguel. And I'm like, oh, ok. So then he had to be like single dad too on top of it.

But, uh, yeah, 

[00:19:07] JoAnn Crohn: but he did it! 

[00:19:09] Brie Tucker: He did do it. But then guess what? There's plenty of days where I'm like, Hey, the dog seems to have an empty bowl. Have you fed him? And he is like, oh no, I forgot. And I'm like, okay, because that's supposed to be his job. And he's like, it's just kind of fallen away. And I just started to pick it back up again.

I'm not doing a good job delegating. 

[00:19:27] Amanda Rush Holmes: Well, I challenge you. 

[00:19:28] Brie Tucker: Yeah? 

[00:19:29] Amanda Rush Holmes: Is it your job to delegate? Because then it puts the mental load back on you to then delegate. Like, I struggle with that. I'm like, true. I see it, I do it, I see it, I do it and I'm aware of this. But then I also am the same person that complains about the mental load.

Mm-hmm. Like I'm being, I'm being transparent on my, of my flaws right here. Like that happens a lot. So I've been trying to think. Kinda like you're talking about Joanne, like, ok, we do it cause we're expected to do it. But like how can, and I hate you to even use the word train cause this sounds like I'm like training a dog, but like how skills, 

[00:20:01] JoAnn Crohn: build skills there we're, 

[00:20:03] Amanda Rush Holmes: how can I build skills for my husband that like allows him to take some of this on without me feeling like I'm his mom?

[00:20:11] JoAnn Crohn: I have the. Yes, you have to go away. Like you have to go away. You have to away to Europe, you just have to, well, like Europe, I go away to like, I plan, like we plan girls trips. I do like business retreats. I go to conferences and I'm like, I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go. Because when you go, you don't have that control.

And before you go, do not write up any. Like, there are no plans. There are no like task lists, there is nothing. There's simply like the typical family calendar so that, you know, everyone knows where everyone is, like whatever you have or any special appointments, and then you leave because when you leave, you're not seeing it, so you can't do it.

Uh, you're not, you're not there to remind. The natural consequences of things pile up. If the dog hasn't been fed, that dog is gonna start causing some issues. 

[00:21:05] Brie Tucker: He's gonna start gnaw on their legs, 

[00:21:07] JoAnn Crohn: gn being destructive, whining all the time, going get 

[00:21:11] Brie Tucker: the trash, whatever. 

[00:21:13] JoAnn Crohn: And the best thing is, You don't have to see it because you're gone having fun.

[00:21:18] Brie Tucker: That is true. 

[00:21:18] Amanda Rush Holmes: Ok. True. I love this idea. Thank you for giving me permission to go take a really fun vacation all by myself. 

[00:21:24] Brie Tucker: Yes. That permission goes out everybody, to everybody. You have to do everything. 

[00:21:28] JoAnn Crohn: We're having a retreat here actually in Phoenix with specifically that in mind. Like cuz moms have to go, they have to go, they have to discover who they are outside their families.

Cuz when you go away, like the first day, you're like, oh, you're still kind of. And then the second day, you start remembering what it's like to be you again and what it's like not to have to think about, oh my gosh, are my kids hungry? Oh my gosh, are they cold? Are they in the right things? Is everyone happy?

You start just focusing in on you, and it's this wonderful thing that you get to bring back with you from vacation as well. That sounds like fun. Yes. Yes. Going back to what you do though, like this whole making money on your own terms, like it really allows you the freedom to be able to do that more. Yes, because when you're your own boss, you get to decide.

When you work, you get to decide how you work. You could even take your work with you on like a vacation, just like do it by the beach. That sounds pretty good. Yes. 

[00:22:29] Amanda Rush Holmes: It's, yeah, it really is the best. And I think, you know, as moms, like we were talking about, you know, what do you do if your kid gets sick? Or like they invite you for something fun, like you get to go be room parent and like read the book and bring the snacks.

And you wanna be that person that says yes to that. Now you can. Yeah. And so it's cool because, I think a lot of people are afraid by this because when you think about security and things like a steady income and all of these things, it seems so daunting if you're, if you have that like nine to five to think like there's this whole other option out there.

Yeah. I feel like it's so much easier if you're somebody who's already made the decision, like I'm taking this year off to then explore that. Mm-hmm. And I fully recognize that, but at the same time, it's kinda like, You're in control. You get to decide like, how much do I wanna work today? Yeah. How much money do I wanna make?

What am I gonna charge? Who do I wanna work with? Do I wanna take a two week vacation in September? Cause I wanna do something fun and go on like a girls trip. Then like you get to plan all that into your calendar, and I think that freedom and flexibility to be able to decide like, this is what's important to me and this is where I'm gonna spend my time, is just something that like a typical nine to five just can't ever.

You like, you get like one standard two weeks vacation and like half of that's probably going to like days that you had to take off cause like your kid was sick. Mm-hmm. You know, like that sucks. 

[00:23:58] Brie Tucker: Yeah. 

[00:23:59] JoAnn Crohn: Yeah, it does suck. And there's like an additional side to that as well. Like, I always think of this like as a business owner, that sometimes I get really stressed.

About making the money and bringing in the revenue and like doing all the things. But then I look at the other side of it, and I just remember when I was working for someone else and I wasn't my own boss, I was so bitter and resentful. I was just like, I did not like being told what to do. I didn't agree with it sometimes, and I didn't feel like I had a.

Ever, especially, you know, working in the public school system with like testing, there's all those issues, especially in Arizona doing what's, yeah, especially in Arizona, doing what's best for kids versus what the school district thinks you should do. But it's like, I don't, I wouldn't trade it. I wouldn't trade it for the freedom and flexibility of working for yourself or working from home.

I mean, 

[00:24:53] Amanda Rush Holmes: even on days where I'm like, oh my gosh, this was a harder day than others. If I think back, would I go back to a nine to five job? The answer is always like, Absolutely not. Like this is still 10 times so much better. But I think about myself. I feel like when I moved into this online space and started working from home, I feel like I became a different person.

Like I was so much lighter. I was happier. I got to do things that I've always wanted to do, but never really could do. Like sign up for yoga. Have, you know, coffee with other moms in the neighborhood and like, let the kids play together. And now we're to the point, you know, where we have. The core side of things where we get to train people, but we also have people that work for us.

So like we get to train people to do this on their own, but we also get to employ moms and like there's just this beautiful evolution. I even think about my marriage, like my marriage is so much healthier because I was able to take care of myself, so now I can show up better as a wife. And as a mom, I feel like when you're, you are strong as a mom and you and your partner are strong, whatever that relationship looks like, it just trickles down to the kids and they're happier and they feel like their cups are being filled up and their needs are being met.

So it's been really cool. You know, they always say like, hindsight is 2020. Like to be able to look back and see this huge transformation and I truly owe it all to just being able to work from home. Enjoy my job. Like as simple as that sounds. 

[00:26:21] Brie Tucker: And you've felt this transformation and as little as just a couple of years.

Yeah. Because you said like it all started around 2020 and here we are 2023. And you have seen so much, so many changes. That's amazing. 

[00:26:34] Amanda Rush Holmes: Yeah, it's crazy. I can't believe it's only been three years. 

[00:26:38] JoAnn Crohn: Yeah, that's wild. And that's awesome because when you decide to step in and make that change is when you know if you made the right decision or not.

So many people hold off from working at home or making a change like this because they get into their heads about, oh my gosh, well, what if this happens and what if this happens and we'll have to do this? And, and they talk to themselves out of it before they've even begun, not even being allowed to explore it.

When you were allowed to explore it and make the change, you found like all of these wonderful things. And even if someone stepped in and made the change and maybe they don't find. It's as wonderful or it brings up new issues. I found it brought up a lot of new issues in me that I had to address in myself personally.

When I started working from home, mainly my perfectionism, it, it was all my own thought process of how much I had to work and how much I had to bring in, and what an effective business owner, a successful business owner looks like. But when you make that change, you find those things, you're able to address them, and I think that's where you grow the most as a person.

[00:27:42] Amanda Rush Holmes: Yeah, 100%. I agree with that. I think one of the cool things about putting yourself in a new situation is it forces you to change which, and then forces you to grow and you can't really have growth without change. Mm-hmm. But the same thing, like there are definitely moments where I'm like, oh wow, I am not equipped to do what X, Y, and Z of what I'm about to do, but we're about to figure it out.

And so you wouldn't be put in that situation if, if you were still sort of in. Your comfort zone of your box. Yeah. Of whatever that looks like. Whether you're happy in your job or you're not happy in your job. Like I think most people, if they're thinking about making a change, typically it's not a situation where they're super excited about the work that they're doing, or they feel trapped by it.

You know, like they're like, I have to do this because of X, Y, and Z. Mm-hmm. And they don't feel like there is an alternate option. 

[00:28:34] JoAnn Crohn: Yeah, definitely. It's so, it's so interesting. But I am happy that you have this option for moms and that you're spreading it everywhere and sharing it, because the ability to work from home and have the freedom to do what you wanna do is such a gift.

So, yeah. Amanda, what are you looking forward to right now that's coming up for. 

[00:28:57] Amanda Rush Holmes: Oh my gosh, so many things. I think the biggest thing that I'm looking forward to this year is really just being able to support moms and their journey of. Making money on their own terms and working from home. We just rolled out a certification to be able to back up the full-time BA so that you know, if somebody is making that transition from their nine to five job, they can feel confident that they have the certification to back them up.

That's legitimized. For business owners, so that's really exciting. We also just have like some fun new programs that we're gonna be launching this year to help our students. And a lot of them, they'll have access to just by being full-time BA members. It's not like we're gonna like charge them extra or anything like that.

So I'm 

excited for them to be able to go through those. So 

[00:29:44] Brie Tucker: like if there's a skill that somebody doesn't have, you guys have courses that they can help to learn those things? 

[00:29:49] Amanda Rush Holmes: Yes, we're adding on, it's called studio skills. So basically all of the skills that we've acquired from our agency is called the Virtual Assistant Studio, and we have a plethora of things that we do for our clients.

And so we're taking all those and making kinda like little mini courses and we're giving our full-time ba. Students access to all that information, so that's awesome. They'll obviously be trained on like how to be a general va, but then if somebody's like, I would really love to like dive into Pinterest management or how to manage a podcast, you know?

Mm-hmm. That's interesting. They'll be able to go through those little mini courses in the studio section and then they'll be trained on that. 

[00:30:31] Brie Tucker: That's awesome. 

[00:30:32] JoAnn Crohn: That's very cool. Yeah. Yeah. It's been lovely talking with you, Amanda. Thank you so much for joining us on the podcast, and we'll talk to you soon.

[00:30:41] Amanda Rush Holmes: Thank you. Thank you so much for having me. This is awesome. 

[00:30:46] JoAnn Crohn: Okay, Brie, let's pull 

back the curtain a little bit. We're pulling back the curtain on no guilt, mom as two. We teased a little bit in the intro that like this interview with Amanda was so, so good, so good. Immediately when we finished it and we started talking to her, So what exactly does your studio do?

[00:31:07] Brie Tucker: Like gimme more details. Cause it sounds like listening to everything she was talking about, it really made us think about where our, where our strengths are, what we are really good at, and what is that? I don't wanna say mind block, but what is that thing that is keeping us from jumping over and being able to find people to help us with the things that we're not so strong.

[00:31:28] JoAnn Crohn: Asking for help is hard. A lot of the delegation, a lot of, I think our society makes it think that we have to do things all by ourselves, like all by ourselves. 

[00:31:35] Brie Tucker: And that you're better, you're somehow better. If you can be Superman and you can do everything, or Supermom, you can be, you're just phenomenal.

And if you, and if you can't, then you're not perfect. 

[00:31:43] JoAnn Crohn: You know what my self-talk is? Maybe some other people have this self-talk as well, but it's like, Joanne, you are being so wasteful if you don't take the time and energy to learn how to do this and do it. Which is totally counterintuitive to actually building and running a business.

By the way, you cannot scale to a large business if you try to do every single role by yourself. That is something that's been told to be my multiple coaches and apparently has still not sunken, 

[00:32:13] Brie Tucker: I would say you can, you'll be miserable. Everybody around you will be miserable in your, in your, in your project or your company or whatever it is that you're working on, will never be.

Will never reach the potential it could have reached if you didn't seek out other individuals that had strengths and bring them onto your team. 

[00:32:32] JoAnn Crohn: Well, yeah, and I think this is even stronger for women. I would go, and this, this will sound like a tangent, but I promise you it is not a tangent. When I was going to Weight Watchers meetings, there was a leader there and like I only went to one meeting with her because she pissed.

But she's like, yeah, I don't know why so many people hire others to clean their houses. It is such a good workout. They should just put the work in and then they'll like, and your face is like, oh my gosh. But that is the mentality we are fighting against that we should not get other people's help because we're somehow lazy or less than if we get their help.

Yeah. Or less than if we get. And I've been working a lot trying to switch my mindset into letting other people help because when you let others in, that's actually really great for them too. I mean, in the business sense. Even in the home sense, you're here providing an opportunity to pay someone to do what they are really. Good at, what they're super efficient at, and to let them contribute and to.

That's all I wanted. Like I just wanna contribute and help others. Well, so why am I not letting other people do the same for me? Well, 

[00:33:46] Brie Tucker: right. And then also just giving yourself the gift of taking away some of that mental load. Mm-hmm. Because we can only take on so much. And that is one thing that, like I've definitely come to the conclusion the last couple of years.

There's been a lot of stuff going on in my, my family kind of personal life that's made me realize that the time I have with my loved ones, Very limited. And if I'm spending all of my time working over trying to get things done it in, in every job I've ever had, I'm just taking away from that time that's never gonna come back to me.

That and the things that I really like, truly like my, make my soul happy and excited. So yeah, it's, it's important to let that mental load go on the things that 

[00:34:30] JoAnn Crohn: we. There's something my husband always tells me when I'm like, oh my gosh, I have so many things to do. And he's like, there are infinite things to do, and you have to make your choices on what to do.

Like there will never be a time where you're done. 

[00:34:44] Brie Tucker: We have to have an episode where we have him on. Honestly, I just wanna hear some of his, like, insightful one, one liners. He has a lot of really good, he does fantastic things that he says. I'm like, I, I just a lot of one liners that he's fantastic. 

[00:34:59] JoAnn Crohn: You know, I would, I would before look at that and I'd be like, oh my gosh, he has like, this is what I need to be.

This is, but it's like everyone has their strengths and you learn from peop their strengths. And you also have strengths yourself, and you give of your strengths. So yeah, if you're feeling the same way, don't discount what you have. You have a lot. 

[00:35:17] Brie Tucker: Yeah. And you know what, and if you heard this episode and it inspired you to.

Look into taking the skills that you have and trying to start a new path for you where you have more control. By all means, check out the info and the link. We've got all of Amanda's info for the VA studio, if not even that. Just realizing that bringing people in, super helpful. And again, doesn't have to be the capacity we're talking about necessarily.

We all have different ways we can bring people in, but yeah, exactly. You have let go. Doesn't, you don't have to do it all. You don't have to do. 

[00:35:51] JoAnn Crohn: No. And remember the best Mom is a happy mom. Take care of you and we'll talk to you later. 

[00:35:58] Brie Tucker: Thanks for stopping by.